stay

everything was so perfect. now its like a dream dats shattering before me n i cant do anything to prevent the disaster. i feel so disappointed. so terribly extremely disappointed. there's a saying dat disappointment is a bitter pill... or is it failure? wadever...they're both bitter anyway. i also feel betrayed... i cant ask him to stay if there's better things ahead for him... its his future. i juz wish things wud be the way i envisioned it. i dunno wad i wan. i enrolled there to be in the same place as him. now he tells me he's goin sumwhere else to study. then wad about me? im gonna be alone. poor sad lonely friendless me. there's honestly noone i noe there. how cud he juz leave me there... but it'll be selfish to make him stay. his parents wan him to go coz he'll get a better education there. my parents cant afford to send me directly there. i'll have to do twinning. i wan him to stay. i wan him to rebel against his parents wishes. yes, i noe im selfish. but who isnt? y does he always have to obey them? cant he fight back? but i dun tink he will.... he's smarter than dat.... he noes its for his own good. argh! i noe its not his fault... will we still be together? if he leaves i tink we wont be able to defeat the distance. it'll be over. maybe it nvr even began. he doesnt believe in long distance relationships......... i dun tink i do either. i need presence, a physical being, not words or pics.

goin dutch

according to wikipedia: Going Dutch is a slang term that means that each person eating at a restaurant or paying admission for entertainment pays for himself or herself, rather than one person paying for everyone. It is also called Dutch date or Dutch treat.

smewlie n i have developed a version of going dutch. when the time comes to pay, we both pay but with varying amounts and the amout having nth to do with the amount we individually spent. haha... confused? im not good at explaining stuff... hehe. its sth like if the bill says $32.80 then he takes out a $50 n i produce $2.80. then he keeps the change. lol~ sounds unfair? sumtimes we reverse roles depending on who has what. i like to think of it as symbiosis. but sumhow i always get the feeling that he eventually ends up paying more on the long run... bluek!
i hereby resolve to start paying the big notes! hehe~

btw, im gonna post the prom pics as soon as i've uploaded everything. so far i've only got post prom pics so i wont be posting it up just yet.