depressed

i feel so depressed.... ive been flunking in maths and i totally dun understand a thing!!! we had directed investigation today. its group work n its meant to pull up the marks of the lousier students like me. but the week b4 i leant my graphic calculator to my frn n she din bring it today....so i totally cudnt do anything coz the calculator was needed for all the questions. then since she din bring her own calculator either, she borrowed the teachers calculator so i was the only 1 in class wifout a calc. sigh... its not relli fair is it? i mean she shud at least have the conscience to let me use teachers since she was the 1 at fault.
i dun even tink she realised how unfair it was of her.... teacher realised wad happened after class n sed i shud talk to her but.... sigh...i dunno la... i dun like confrontations. i wish i were the old bitchier me. then i'd give her a run for her money! arghhhh..... i wan the old me back!!
tml i have directed investigation again, i hope i rmbr to borrow a calc from my frens n i hope they dun need it when i do.
whatsmore i totally wasted last weekend! i wish there was sumway for me to feel rajin n motivated. nowadays i juz feel so LAZY!!! i have no mood to study at all! i guess its my own fault...i memang very 'tham wan'(playful) . i have to buck up! but so far ive only been saying it.... no action done. i used to tink i was totally unaffected by moving here, but i guess im more affected than i tink. its true wad they say: its the ones dat always seem happy dat r relli sad inside.
im sick n tired of those ppl dat always complain about their problems to me, expecting me to pity them n understand them, but when i t comes to MY problems, they dun even wanna hear it at all! i understand that their problems may be bigger or whatever, but it doesnt make my life and problems any less significant to me. their problems matter hugely to them, cant they see mine matter hugely to me too! y i s every1 so selfish... im not saying im not selfish, but there are LIMITS! even my ex was like dat! argh... tinking of him makes my blood boil!
i cant wait till SAM is over... i mean i like the ppl n the living atmosphere, but the workload n common tests r driving a lazy person like me crazy!! summore there not even enuf eng taus here to soothe my eyes after stressing. lol.... back to my old humour. i used to tink taylors was full of eng taus n leng luis... there r a few... but not enuf! hahahah....
i guess dats all for now. thank god teacher is allowing us to cont our DI tml or i'd be so screwed for math n all my team members wud blame me!