still standing

have u ever looked forward to sth then suddenly changed ur mind about it? well, i sure feel dat way. i guess its coz circumstances change, outlooks change, feelings change....*sigh* sth dat i've looked forward to for weeks, i now look upon with apprehension. y cant some things stay constant?
like the k=constant in math? i suppose my cheap joking is a constant...lol~
no matter how i try to lead my life, the decicions i make, the things i do, the things i take for granted, sth always manages to screw up and screw evrything else along the way too... it doesnt help dat i also feel dat it is sumhow my fault.
*sigh* i sure hope evrything turns out fine.

standing here in the rain,
rain drops,
like tear drops,
pattering down on me,
i stand alone,
noone comes,
nobody knows,
its cold,
wet inside and out,
soundless shivers rack my body,
i hear the sounds of celebration in the distance,
here,
all is quiet,
nobody treads here,
i am alone in my silence.

the rain has stopped,
a rainbow appears among the clouds,
only now do i dare to lift my head,
the birds are singing,
a new day has dawned,
again i must rise,
rise and be strong,
i have a long way ahead of me,
many more mistakes to make,
many more times to fall,
stubbornly i carry on,
i will not give up,
i will not give them the satisfaction,
of seeing me beaten!

dunno y i had the sudden urge to write dat...suits my mood tho. ;)